America is a Christian nation because we sell bacon

Religious right leader Bryan Fischer, of the American Family Association, offered definitive “proof” the other day as to why America is a “Christian” nation and not a “Jewish” nation.

Because we sell bacon in America.


Fischer, a darling of Republican presidential hopefuls, has a long history of sticking his rather judgmental Christian foot in his mouth. And this time he didn’t disappoint:

Welcome to the modern Republican party.

Welcome to the modern Republican party.

“You want one single item of proof that America is a Christian nation and not a Jewish nation and not an Islamic nation?” he asked. “One single bit of proof is all you need: we freely allow restaurants and grocery stores to sell and to serve bacon. That can only happen in a Christian country.”

“So the sheer fact that we freely allow the sale and consumption of bacon,” he continued, “is absolute proof that we are, in fact, a Christian nation.”

In fact, you can buy bacon in all of Europe, and many of those countries are not “Christian.” They’re not anything. Though apparently, it ain’t so great in Japan.

Among Fischer’s other gems:

Fischer wants homosexuality to be illegal because he “love[s] black males.”

Hispanics are… socialists,” and that’s why they vote for Democrats.

And my personal favorite: Gays were behind the Holocaust.

As our Jon Green wrote the other day, there’s a very fine line between religious extremism anywhere and everywhere in the world.

I wonder how “Christian” Fischer finds this bacon — I understand it tastes like heaven:

Bacon condoms, seriously. And if you use their bacon-flavored lubricant, it even tastes like bacon.

Bacon condoms, seriously. And if you use their bacon-flavored lubricant, it even tastes like bacon.

Follow me on Twitter: @aravosis | @americablog | @americabloggay | Facebook | Instagram | Google+ | LinkedIn. John Aravosis is the Executive Editor of AMERICAblog, which he founded in 2004. He has a joint law degree (JD) and masters in Foreign Service from Georgetown; and has worked in the US Senate, World Bank, Children's Defense Fund, the United Nations Development Programme, and as a stringer for the Economist. He is a frequent TV pundit, having appeared on the O'Reilly Factor, Hardball, World News Tonight, Nightline, AM Joy & Reliable Sources, among others. John lives in Washington, DC. .

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37 Responses to “America is a Christian nation because we sell bacon”

  1. UFIA says:

    But there were no pigs here before the X-tians showed up.
    Those are native to Europe and Afrika.

    If the Lawd didn’t want us to eat pigs, he wouldn’t have made them from pork.

  2. newbroom says:

    Yep, and we’ve got lagoons of pig waste to show for it!

  3. Two Piece and Biscuit says:

    Is he retarded?

  4. vickif says:

    Those people seem to forget that.

  5. Whellwhell says:

    Years ago, had a working lunch with a sales rep, Jewish, who incidentally worked for Siemens, at their HQ. His first dip into the finger buffet was for one of the few ham sandwiches on the plate. When I looked quizzically at him, he just smiled and said that he liked the taste. Bacon, he explained, was even better, and he then just laughed. Even some Jews and Muslims are obviously prepared to make as much or as little of their religion as they choose to.

  6. rmthunter says:

    I really can’t think of anyone else who works so art at out-stupiding himself.

  7. Mike_in_the_Tundra says:

    Well, not really, but I have seen a couple really butch cabbages.

  8. Bill_Perdue says:

    America is a christer nation just like England, who conducted their Opium wars with ‘muscular christianity’ to force China to import opium.

    I suspect that bankrupt frauds like Fischer wouldn’t care to make that comparison.

  9. Naja pallida says:

    Does your food normally arouse you?

    I think I’ve been using quinoa wrong.

  10. Mike_in_the_Tundra says:

    I’m a vegan, and that picture is a real boner killer.

  11. LasloPratt says:

    I can’t find a single mention of bacon in either the Constitution or the Bible.

  12. Don Chandler says:

    ‘Justice O’Connor simply decrees application of “a more searching form of rational basis review” “–scalia

    People like Bryan Fischer and the whackos in westboro baptist church are the justification for the “more searching form” O’Connor wanted. Of course, the words of Scalia also seemed to have helped the ‘gay cause’ by paving the way, rhetorically, for Marriage Equality. So I often welcome all the porky notions these bozo gay-haters provide, whether it’s Bryan Fischer’s pathetic associations or Scalia’s deep and rational groundwork. Making the enemy work for you is … very satisfying.

  13. Colin says:

    I’m really tired of this nonsense. The trouble is that there are so many who believe it or want it to be true.
    Why? Control .

  14. VivianPTorres says:

    my Aunty Sarah just got a nearly new cream Ford Fiesta by working parttime online. why not try here

  15. BeccaM says:

    Heck, just look at any food label and chances are good you’ll see Kosher markings on it (K, U, or Parve/Pareve). Apparently we’re a Jewish nation.

  16. BeccaM says:

    Yeah, but according to Stephen Colbert, because foods are always what they sound like, Canadian bacon is made out of Canadians, who are known to be a well-marbled people.

  17. BeccaM says:

    In India, it is possible to buy real beef hamburgers, as well as pork products. But as with Turkey, they cost quite a lot and are not sold in many places because very few want them.

  18. BeccaM says:

    Or Native American, who were here before the Christians showed up.

  19. BeccaM says:

    A Type 2 Diabetic…

  20. BeccaM says:

    And yet this nation’s Constitution has that funny little Amendment banning the government from passing any law in establishment of religion. You’d think a Christian theocracy would’ve gone out of its way to emblazon the founding legal documents with edicts to that effect, no?

  21. Naja pallida says:

    Out of all the possible options, Bryan Fischer thinks so little of his own faith that it only boils down to the single defining characteristic of consuming bacon. Kind of sad, really. By that standard, Chris Christie should be the Pope.

  22. Mike F says:

    Really, all one can do about this, vis-a-vis the astoundingly dimwitted and utterly illogical pronouncements of the fascist, feudalistic, theocratic, corporatist, right wing in this country, is to point and laugh.

    So, everybody, in 3, 2, 1…

  23. Baal says:

    We sell gay pornography too.

  24. jomicur says:

    The first time I ever tried bacon on a pizza was in Cairo. So I guess Egypt must be a Christian nation too, huh?

  25. Demosthenes says:

    As a Chicagoan, I prefer using deep dish pizza, Chicago-style hot dogs, and Italian Beef as markers of national pride.

  26. FLL says:

    Or a Buddhist nation, by the same logic.

  27. FLL says:

    :) So true. We also freely sell t-shirts that say:

    Why doesn’t Jesus eat M&Ms?
    Because they fall through the holes in his hands.

    I wonder what that means.

  28. goulo says:

    By his same reasoning, USA is an atheist nation since atheism also has no rules against bacon.

  29. Indigo says:

    We also sell books but to claim that we’re a deeply literate nation might be pushing it a bit.

  30. FLL says:

    Mr. Fischer is confusing the free market with laws that make something illegal. Turkey, which is 99% Muslim, would certainly be considered a Muslim country. In Turkey, you can buy bacon at expensive delicatessens, very large supermarkets and fancy hotels. In Turkey, McDonald’s and other common restaurant chains don’t sell bacon cheeseburgers, but they’re basing their decision on profitability since few people would buy meals with bacon. They’re not basing their decision on any law that makes selling bacon illegal. Mr. Fischer’s blathering is, as always, an epic fail.

  31. therling says:

    What about Canadian bacon? We sell that too.

  32. bkmn says:

    As a poster on JMG pointed out – we sell gay porn.

  33. BillFromDover says:

    I’m queer and can’t get enough bacon.

    What does that make us?

  34. dommyluc says:

    I can buy bottled kim chee at WalMart, so I guess I’m Korean, too. Whoda thunkit?

  35. FatRat says:

    Israelis consume bacon too, aka “white meat”. I guess that means that Israel is also a Christian nation using that Conservative logic. How the Holy Land got a pork habit.

  36. DGT says:

    I’m confused. You can also buy halal food in America. Does that mean we’re an Islamic nation?

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